The topic of sex and sexuality in our classrooms is undoubtedly one of the most delicate challenges educators face today. Many teachers I’ve spoken with feel unprepared to navigate this complex terrain without clear, consistent guidelines. Some have voiced discomfort when they receive book donations on these subjects—well-intentioned, perhaps, but often ill-suited for the age group they teach. The fundamental question they grapple with is straightforward: what is appropriate in a classroom setting?

The heart of their concern is a simple truth: teachers want to teach. They don’t want to become arbiters of what is or isn’t appropriate when it comes to matters as profoundly personal and nuanced as sex and gender. A policy that addresses age and subject appropriateness for these topics would go a long way toward helping educators do what they are best at—educating our children in the core subjects while ensuring that they aren’t left to police these delicate matters without guidance.

This is a complicated issue. But here’s what we all want at the end of the day: we want our schools to be a place where every child, regardless of their gender ideology or sexual orientation, has the opportunity to receive a first-rate education. We want to create an environment where learning comes first, not division or distrust. And yet, we must also acknowledge that society has long treated the topic of sex with great caution—and for good reason.

Think about it. In most settings, even among trusted friends, it’s not considered appropriate to delve into someone else’s private life, especially regarding children. Whether Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish, Agnostic, or otherwise, people from all walks of life have their own deeply held beliefs about when and how these conversations should unfold. We need to respect those differences.

So, what’s the answer? It’s undoubtedly not exclusion. The goal is not to shut anyone out or any topics down. The goal is to create a space where trust can thrive and parents and teachers alike can feel confident that the education system is there to uplift, not overstep. When it comes to teaching minors about sexuality, the rule of thumb should always be to err on the side of caution. Not because these topics don’t matter but because trust is paramount. And trust is built when we, as a society, take seriously the responsibility of educating our young people without imposing values or crossing boundaries that are not ours to cross.

It’s a fraught landscape, to be sure. However, thoughtful policies that respect the diversity of beliefs in our society will ensure that education remains what it should be: a shared pursuit of knowledge, not a battlefield of competing ideologies.

Thanks,

ElizaBeth Hanke